[12:47 PM / Friday / October 5, 2018]
I’m sitting in the backyard of my house while I’m writing this. It’s a warm sunny day and I’m feeling beyond blessed. Blessed that I’m healthy, improving, growing and learning every single day. Blessed that I have two homes, one in Kosovo, where I am at the moment and one in Croatia, where I live. I’m in peace, surrounded by beautiful mountains, fresh air and wherever my eyes go, it makes me feel something meaningful, it makes me realize how much I love it. My grandparents were born and raised here, my parents were born and raised here, my older brother and my older sister were born here, and I, I grew up coming here; coming for that fulfilling joy of feeling at home. There’s so much to come back for: my home, my family, hearing everyone speak my mother language but feeling like I belong somewhere is something completely different and it doesn’t really compare to anything else. I have been feeling pretty much okay, I’ve had my ups and I’ve had my downs and I accept it all. I have been trying to be as gentle with myself as possible and it’s an incredible thing to do. My therapist told me she was proud of me and it’s an amazing thing to hear because I know I’ve been trying hard, in every single aspect. I feel stronger and healthier. I’m surrounded by people who I truly love, however that doesn’t mean that I’m always gonna get along with them. People have their own ways of feeling which means that there will be things we don’t feel the same about. What we can do is take care of ourselves by doing what feels right for us and respect what feels right for others, even if we don’t understand it. Talk things out, be honest and let the energies guide you. Listen to your body, give it what it needs and take care of your mind by eliminating unhealthy ideas and thoughts. Talk to your inner persona and ask it to treat you better, it sounds crazy but it really works. Train your mind to reject ugly thoughts about yourself and replace them with some beautiful ones. Understand the background of your feelings, understand the roots of your problems and don’t be hard on yourself. You’re doing so much better than you think. This is something that was on my mind when I woke up so I thought it would be good to have it written here. A longer story is coming soon. Until then, take care of yourself!
Greetings from Kosovo!
Love, Albesa
Albesa's journal 