Depressed garden

garden= human beings, people

flowers= our lives, beautiful things we have been given

flowers we stepped on= the past, pain

It’s not a secret that my mind is a mess, it has been like this for a long time now but sometimes I find my mind filled with thoughts that surprisingly, do make sense. Since I don’t even know what I’m gonna write about, I’m just gonna throw my thoughts out here hoping they make sense in the end (at least a little bit). I have been thinking about my life and how I really do not value what I’ve been given as much as I should. I do feel bad about it and I’m kind of ashamed because my life has potential to be a very good life. Since there is potential, what’s the problem? The problem is depression. When you’re generally depressed, you lose a big part of yourself and your life. Okay maybe not lose but something similar, maybe forget about it? You live your life feeling down thinking about so many things all at once that you forget what causes you pain in the first place. I may be bad at explaining it but just imagine this; you’re in a garden full of beautiful flowers but you only pay attention to the ones you stepped on. You spend your time trying to get them back to life. You try, try and try but you accidentally step on them again. When you think you’re getting better, something attacks you over and over again and all the beautiful things you have lose their colors. All the flowers around you, the ones you haven’t stepped on, they wait for you to keep them alive but you’re to busy with the ones you stepped on that you make other flowers die too. That is what happens to people when they’re depressed. If you’re brave enough to try harder (I strongly believe you are) the flowers you stepped on are gonna mark what you went through and you’re eventually gonna get out of it, but if you keep your feet on that same path of flowers you stepped on, the rest of the garden is gonna die too and what will happen then? You will be left with nothing. You will be left with ashes. No matter what you’re going through, I believe there is bravery and energy left in you that will make you come back to your normal life. There are a lot of flowers in your garden that you need to take care of. 

(I’ll be repeating this to myself until I get better.)

Love, Albesa x

 

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