[7:44 AM / Tuesday / May 28,2019]
I woke up feeling content today. I woke up feeling like life wasn’t a mess; which wasn’t the case up until four days ago. Rough times are a part of it, but not all of it and this is something everyone of us should remind themselves because things are much more bearable that way. I’m on my way to work right now and I’m happy I’ve learned majority of the stuff I was stressed about. My co-workers don’t seem to like me asking questions all the time so I’m glad that I’m almost ready for working independently. I’m getting there and I seriously can’t wait. Now let me share something very important with you. I’m back to therapy. Not because I’m depressed again, but because I started losing myself in all of the things that I was worried about. My anxiety was getting really bad so I decided to ask for help and go to therapy for a little bit this year too. I learned a lot last year but I have to admit that I was mostly learning how to cope with things I can’t control. I want this year’s therapy to be more about me and what I actually can control. So I went to therapy last Friday. I wasn’t the happiest after that session but everything made more sense once I came home. I thought about everything using more logic and less emotions. I could see myself and my life better that way. I could see stuff that I can improve and how to do it. I told myself to stop having high expectations of myself; just do your best, whatever it is at the moment. One really big and important thing I was worried about was college. And an even bigger and more important thing is that I’ve found a college I want to go to. I can’t wait to be back in college. I think education is very important and if you have the possibility and privilege to get educated, I suggest you take the chance. I know it’s not for everyone however I do think it’s worth trying; you never know. I had no idea about this college before I went to therapy, my therapist mentioned it and said it was a good a idea. I went home, informed myself about it a little bit more, loved the idea of it and I applied right away; now all I can do is wait and hope I get in (I’m gonna write about it more soon). I’m grateful for my health, the possibility to work and earn money, the possibility to afford therapy, the possibility to go to college; none of it is ever taken for granted. I appreciate it all. Just wanted to put that out there. That’s pretty much it my dear people, this was just an update on something that matters to me. Now let’s get to work; I’m in the office trying to finish this story and not get caught using my phone so much. Gotta go, but as always, be kind to yourself.
Til’ next time.